FUTON THE NECK

Newsom Mocks Vance’s Threats With a Trollish Offer

The California governor also clapped back at the vice president’s attack on his crossed legs.

Gov. Gavin Newsom has invited Vice President JD Vance to “personally inspect every couch” in California, after he threatened to investigate alleged fraud in the state.

Vance was talking about probes into alleged benefit fraud during an interview with Fox News host Jesse Watters, who said Newsom, 58, had encouraged agents to look into whether anything untoward was happening in the state.

“Gavin Newsom,” Watters, 47, began. “He says, ‘You guys want to come look at California? Bring it on.’”

AWKWARD

J.D. Vance ‘Couch’ Story Finally Makes Appearance on Fox

William Vaillancourt

“Yeah, well, we will,” Vance, 41, said. “We appreciate that invitation, Gavin. And we are going to accept that invitation because, look, California, more than almost any other state, has been so glaring and obvious about the fact that they’re giving welfare benefits to illegal aliens.”

Newsom hit back on Wednesday night, reiterating his invitation before hurling a dig about the viral but baseless rumor that the Hillbilly Elegy author once got intimate with a couch.

“We hate fraud—come in, JD,” Newsom’s press office wrote on X. “You’re welcome to personally inspect every couch and flip every cushion.”

The couch gag is a favorite of Newsom’s, who in October shared an AI-generated video of Vance’s likeness, saying people who don’t see couches the way he does are the weird ones.

“But what I don’t understand is why people are so obsessed with this other thing, couch intimacy,” the satirical video said. “Look, couches are comfortable, they’re dependable. They support you when you’re down. If you can’t appreciate that kind of bond, maybe you’re the one with issues.”

Vance’s threats to Newsom came amid MAGA’s escalating war on Minnesota and its governor, Tim Walz, claiming the state has become a hotbed of fraud. The Department of Health and Human Services said it was freezing childcare payments to the state, and Walz said he wouldn’t run for re-election amid the allegations.

Newsom’s name was on Vance’s lips more than once in the Watters interview. The host also teed up the vice president with a very specific question right after coming back from a break.

“Gavin Newsom, obviously running for president. Have you seen this guy cross his legs? Have you ever seen anyone cross their legs like that?”

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“My legs don’t cross like that, Jesse,” Vance replied. “You can interpret that however you want to.”

But Newsom was soon there again, resharing the clip of Vance on his personal account with an AI-generated image of himself striking an impossibly contorted pose.

“Namaste, JD,” the caption read above the image of him wearing all black with bulging biceps.

Talk of Newsom’s crossed legs has been rife since his appearance at The New York Times Dealbook Summit in December, where he spoke with columnist Andrew Sorkin with his ankle resting flat on the stage.

Newom’s press office also jumped on Vance’s leg attack, posting an equally AI-generated, equally contorted image of Vance pulling off a wild legs-through-arms tranquility pose.

“We all know JD copies Daddy,” the caption read, poking fun at the affection MAGA has for the president.

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Harry ThompsonNews Reporter

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