‘PAYS OTHER PEOPLE’

John Leguizamo Takes Down Donald ‘Bad at Sex’ Trump on ‘Daily Show’

“You can actually see his brain trying to turn the car around and his mouth was driving,” John Leguizamo observed.

You might expect Donald Trump to be better at lying, but as John Leguizamo pointed out Monday night, that is most definitely not the case.

“We’re still all waiting for the cops to arrest him for lying about his affair with a porn star,” The Daily Show guest host said on Monday. “But until then he’s continuing his presidential campaign and staying focused on the important issues, like lying about his affair with a porn star.”

Leguizamo shared clips from Trump’s first official 2024 election rally, which took place in Waco, Texas, on Saturday, where the former president—who Leguizamo described as “the man so bad at sex he pays other people not to talk about it”—decried the investigation into Trump’s hush-money payment scandal as “bullshit” and “unfair.”

“I never liked Horseface,” Trump told the crowd of adulators, in reference to Daniels. “That wouldn’t be the one,” he added, digging an even deeper hole for himself. “There is no one. We have a great first lady.”

“Wow,” was about all Leguizamo could muster in response… at least at first. “Wow, nice save bro,” he said. “Mmm hmmm. You can actually see his brain trying to turn the car around and his mouth was driving: ‘I… I didn’t have an affair. And I never had an affair. And I’ve actually never had sex. Do you know that? I’m a virgin. And the best and biggest virgin ever.’”

But really, Leguizamo is actually kind of impressed that Trump has the audacity to be both “running for office, and from the law at the same time. How great is that? He’s going to be the first presidential candidate who’s going to be giving speeches from his getaway car.”

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Jennifer M. Wood

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