A light internet roasting is the price one must pay for relatability, as the newly-minted King Charles II is quickly discovering. In recent days, the English monarch has come up against a fiendish enemy, one that threatens the very sanctity of his short reign: fountain pens. The king became visibly angry on Tuesday as he attempted to sign a visitor’s book during a visit to Northern Ireland’s Hillsborough Castle, exclaiming, “I can’t bear this bloody thing… every stinking time.” His wife and queen consort, Camilla, remained calm during the emergency, tepidly observing, “Oh, look, it’s going everywhere.” Frazzled by the malfunction, Charles also got the date wrong, before being corrected by an aide. He previously did battle with his inky foe on Saturday, before the Accession Council in the State Apartments of St. James’ Palace, when a visibly irritated Charles gestured furiously to aides to shift an inkpot and pen box off a small desk so he could sign the Accession Proclamation. For those keeping score at home, that makes it 2-0 to the writing implements.