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Man Sparks Police Panic With Screams of ‘Why Don’t You Die’... at a Spider

Australian cops scrambled at reports of attempted murder—only to find man trying to kill spider.

Police in a suburb of Perth, Australia, sent multiple officers to what they assumed was a bloody crime scene after a passerby heard a man yelling, “Why don’t you die!” over the screams of a child. When the officers arrived, they found the man visibly shaken after unsuccessfully trying to kill a spider that had apparently eluded him for hours. According to a published police log, the caller “heard a male screaming out ‘Why don’t you die’ repeatedly. The toddler inside was screaming… caller doesn’t know them, but has seen them a few times when walking.” Twenty minutes later, the police then updated the situation. “Police spoke with all parties who advised that husband had only been trying to kill a spider (has serious fear of spiders),” according to the police docket published in the local press. “Apologized for inconvenience to police. No injuries sighted (except to spider). No further police involvement required.”