Mariah Carey opened up about her battle with bipolar disorder in an interview with People. The pop icon says she was diagnosed in 2001 when she was “hospitalized for a physical and mental breakdown,” and she “didn’t want to believe it.” She only sought treatment recently—including therapy and medication for “bipolar II disorder”—after a very difficult couple of years, Carey said. The singer thought that her sleeplessness was due to a “severe sleep disorder,” but it turned out to be a form of mania. “Eventually I would just hit a wall,” she explained. “I guess my depressive episodes were characterized by having very low energy.” Carey said she lived in “constant fear someone would expose” her. “It was too heavy a burden to carry and I simply couldn’t do that anymore,” she told the magazine. “I sought and received treatment, I put positive people around me and I got back to doing what I love—writing songs and making music.” According to the magazine, Carey is currently back in the studio working an album due later this year.