‘I’M A SILLY GOOSE’

Minnesota GOP Candidate Accused of Throwing Tarantula at Alleged ‘Squatter’

“I’m good at creatively solving problems, and at the end of the day, I didn’t physically harm anybody.”

A self-described “unhinged” Minnesota woman running for local office was arrested after reportedly chucking a tarantula at another tenant in the house she lives in. Marisa Christina Simonetti, a 30-year-old Republican candidate running for a seat on the Hennepin County Board, was arrested outside of Minneapolis last Friday on charges of fifth-degree misdemeanor assault, with fear of bodily harm or death stemming from the incident. The alleged victim, attorney Jackie Vasquez, called police to report Simonetti was trespassing in the section of the house she lives in, and later told local station KARE 11 News that Simonetti had thrown, among other things, a live tarantula at her. Simonetti, who was released on $2,000 bond on Monday, told the outlet that Vasquez was a “squatter” whose lease had run out. To local Fox affiliate KMSP, she explained that she’d borrowed the tarantula stunt from Home Alone. “I’m good at creatively solving problems, and at the end of the day, I didn’t physically harm anybody,” Simonetti insisted. “I’m a little unconventional in my ways—sometimes. I mean, I’m a silly goose.”