GETAWAY

OMG, I Want to Rent That House: New Paltz, NY

OMG, I Want to Rent This House spotlights the most spectacular and unique homes that you can actually stay in.

New Paltz, NY (Vrbo): Utopia is a dream, a fantasy, a historically failed experiment. Or at least it was. Your next vacation in the Hudson River Valley can achieve agrarian perfection when you spirit your family away to this renovated farmhouse in New Paltz that comes complete with barns and creeks and six acres of land to stomp around on. If that isn’t the recipe for achieving family bliss, we don’t know what is.

Seated family dinners are a given when you’re living that rural vacation life. And since this is utopia, we’re assuming your evening repasts will be free of all family bickering and technology at the table. Any attempts to burst this fantasy are not appreciated.

This colonial farmhouse is aptly named—it was built over 300 years ago by a local farmer. But while it has plenty of that vintage 18th century charm, it was recently renovated to give it a hefty dose of modern luxury.

Only farm-to-table fare is allowed in this kitchen. But if you choose to pick those fruits and veggies from the grocery store aisles rather than the actual garden, we won’t judge.

There is one dining rule while on holiday: no two meals should be enjoyed in the same location. (OK, two rules: outsource the actual cooking and cleaning whenever possible.) Here, you can take breakfast on this lovely rustic sun porch, lunch on a picnic on the rolling green lawn, and dinner at the formal maple dining room table.

The big-screen movie drought is over! A Mare of Easttown catch-up on the projector, anyone?

The farmhouse has four bedrooms, but not all of them come with a claw-foot bathtub with a view. We’re calling dibs.

Exposed brick walls may be all the rage in pre-war walk-ups in New York City, but on the greens of the Hudson River Valley, it’s all about the stone. Pair that with a cozy fireplace and you’ve got a room worthy of Martha Washington.

Is there anything more romantic than a dip in the saltwater pool by moonlight? We think not, except for…

Maybe a turn in the wood-burning barrel sauna. We hear this wooden beauty is surrounded by apple trees just in case you need a little snack in the middle of all that shvitzing.

We know we’ve promised you a utopian family vacation, but even we aren’t that powerful. In order to make sure things don’t devolve into the dystopian, it might be a good idea to take a little time away from your loved ones in the steam room.

This house has lived many lives. Not only was it the land’s original farmhouse courtesy of the cattle farmer who built it, but it has also served time as an inn, so it has some serious vacation rental credentials.

This property is rolling in the green—Esopus creek runs through it ready for all your fishing and kayaking needs, there is plenty of land to hike, it borders a nature preserve, and it has views of the Catskills.

Now this is a modern barn we can get behind. We’ve always heard that cows appreciate a nice disco ball.

This home is perfectly situated to get away from it all (and by “it all,” we mean the month of normal socializing that has us all pining for the good old days of quiet lockdown). But if you take one look at this scene and decide you’d rather plan a little barn dance instead, we wouldn’t blame you.

Book Your Stay: Renovated Stone House, New Paltz, NY $2,100/night via Vrbo

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Allison McNearney

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