CrosswordNewsletters
DAILY BEAST
ALL
  • Cheat Sheet
  • Obsessed
  • Politics
  • Crime
  • Entertainment
  • Media
  • Innovation
  • Opinion
  • World
  • U.S. News
  • Scouted
CHEAT SHEET
    POLITICS
    • Fever Dreams
    • Biden World
    • Elections
    • Opinion
    • National Security
    • Congress
    • Pay Dirt
    • The New Abnormal
    • Right Richter
    • Trumpland
    MEDIA
    • Confider
    • Daytime Talk
    • Late-Night
    • Fox News
    U.S. NEWS
    • Identities
    • Crime
    • Race
    • LGBT
    • Extremism
    • Coronavirus
    WORLD
    • Russia
    • Europe
    • China
    • Middle East
    INNOVATION
    • Science
    TRAVEL
      ENTERTAINMENT
      • TV
      • Movies
      • Music
      • Comedy
      • Sports
      • Sex
      • TDB's Obsessed
      • Awards Shows
      • The Last Laugh
      CULTURE
      • Power Trip
      • Fashion
      • Books
      • Royalist
      TECH
      • Disinformation
      SCOUTED
      • Clothing
      • Technology
      • Beauty
      • Home
      • Pets
      • Kitchen
      • Fitness
      • I'm Looking For
      BEST PICKS
      • Best VPNs
      • Best Gaming PCs
      • Best Air Fryers
      COUPONS
      • Vistaprint Coupons
      • Ulta Coupons
      • Office Depot Coupons
      • Adidas Promo Codes
      • Walmart Promo Codes
      • H&M Coupons
      • Spanx Promo Codes
      • StubHub Promo Codes
      Products
      NewslettersPodcastsCrosswordsSubscription
      FOLLOW US
      GOT A TIP?

      SEARCH

      HOMEPAGE
      Fox News

      Fox News’ Jeanine Pirro Kinda Has On-Air Orgasm Over Mueller Report on SNL

      WHAT SHE’S HAVING

      Cecily Strong’s Fox News host called Trump a ‘USDA-certified sex machine who can wax that ass from dusk until dawn.’

      Matt Wilstein

      Senior Writer

      Updated Mar. 31, 2019 2:51PM ET / Published Mar. 31, 2019 1:00AM ET 
      On 'Saturday Night Live,' Fox News' Jeanine Pirro (Cecily Strong) has a series of on-air orgasms over the Mueller Report and Trump.
      NBC

      Jeanine Pirro returned to the air after a two-week suspension Saturday night for making Islamophobic comments about Rep. Ilhan Omar (D-MN). And on Saturday Night Live, Cecily Strong revived her version of the Fox News host in what was hands-down one of the funniest “Weekend Update” desk pieces in recent memory.

      “I’m Judge Jeanine Pirro, and it’s up to you to decide just what my whole deal is,” Strong’s Pirro told Colin Jost. “This Mueller report completely exonerated the president and therefore everybody on the Trump train. Woo woo! So somebody at Fox News said my name into a bathroom mirror three times and here I am.”

      She went on to thank her biggest fans for watching, including “horny men laying on in-home hospital beds” and “white prison gangs who control the remote on Saturdays.”

        Asked if she really thinks Attorney General William Barr’s four-page letter “totally exonerates” Trump, Pirro replied, “It’s crystal clear! No collusion, no obstruction. The report concludes that the president is 35 years old and 175 pounds. He’s got the rugged good looks of Bradley Cooper and he smells like steak and complementary bathroom cologne. And he’s a USDA-certified sex machine who can wax that ass from dusk until dawn.”

        Then, when Jost told his guest that Trump might “completely close the border with Mexico,” Pirro literally fell off her chair. Composing herself, she said, “Oh, I just get so damn excited about Trump unleashed. Whoa mama!”

          Matt Wilstein

          Senior Writer

          @mattwilsteinmatt.wilstein@thedailybeast.com

          Got a tip? Send it to The Daily Beast here.

          READ THIS LIST

          DAILY BEAST
          • Cheat Sheet
          • Politics
          • Entertainment
          • Media
          • World
          • Innovation
          • U.S. News
          • Scouted
          • Travel
          • Subscription
          • Crossword
          • Newsletters
          • Podcasts
          • About
          • Contact
          • Tips
          • Jobs
          • Advertise
          • Help
          • Privacy
          • Code of Ethics & Standards
          • Diversity
          • Terms & Conditions
          • Copyright & Trademark
          • Sitemap
          • Best Picks
          • Coupons
          • Coupons:
          • Dick's Sporting Goods Coupons
          • HP Coupon Codes
          • Chewy Promo Codes
          • Nordstrom Rack Coupons
          • NordVPN Coupons
          • JCPenny Coupons
          • Nordstrom Coupons
          • Samsung Promo Coupons
          • Home Depot Coupons
          • Hotwire Promo Codes
          • eBay Coupons
          • Ashley Furniture Promo Codes
          © 2023 The Daily Beast Company LLC