President Donald Trump “didn’t just talk the talk” with Kim Jong Un in Singapore this week, Stephen Colbert said Tuesday night. He also showed him a bizarre fake movie trailer that was meant to inspire the North Korean dictator to choose peace over war.
“The video shows Kim that peace brings all of the incredible riches that stock footage can provide: delicious food, drone delivery, slides, speedboat races, unlimited babies, and monster jams,” the Late Show host said. “That, of course, was to appeal to Kim's famous love of basketball and his favorite team, the Generic City Stock Footages!”
Colbert went on to suggest that the video “really could have used an editor” because “they repeated themselves a lot.” The trailer had “four different bridges to the future, two people wearing VR headsets, the ‘Destiny Pictures logo twice, and not one, not two, not three, not four, but five different sunrises.”
“Trump put five different suns in there, and, no surprise, none of them were Eric,” he joked.
Worried that the video might not be quite powerful enough to convince Kim Jong Un to give up his nuclear weapons, Colbert presented his own “even more compelling trailer” to viewers.
“Earth, where history happens, and history is always moving forward, because that’s how time works,” the video began. “Can two powerful men forge the bond that brings world peace?” the narrator asked later. “And lose their virginity before prom?”
“This summer, love goes nuclear!” the trailer continued. “Will you shake the hand of peace? Will you massage the ankles of history? Will you slam dunk the ball of destiny? And how many sunrises... will... it... take?”
The film’s title summed it all up: The Summit of All Fears: Mission Kimpossible II: Singapore Drift.