“Syria is making for bitter conflict, generational divisions, warring factions—and that’s just in the White House,” Stephen Colbert said during his Late Show monologue on Wednesday of President Donald Trump’s “precision strike” in Syria. “Yes, a precision strike, because it happened at the precise moment James Comey launched his book tour.”
Noting that Trump gave Bashar al-Assad’s regime “plenty of advance warning on Twitter,” Colbert quoted a Washington Post article that reported that missiles “did not hit a single airplane, airfield, or delivery system.”
“That’s how precise this strike was,” the host said. “Any bomb can hit something. But only the smartest bombs can miss everything.” The move was intended to be combined with additional sanctions on Syria’s patron Russia, which brought Colbert to UN ambassador and “the next person getting fired” Nikki Haley.
Haley announced new sanctions only to be undercut by the administration when they scrapped that plan the following day. “We tried to get a follow-up from Nikki Haley, but it’s so hard to reach her under that bus,” Colbert joked.
When Trump heard Haley’s announcement, he reportedly starting yelling at his TV screen, “Who wrote that for her?” To which Colbert replied, “Fun fact, Mr. President, not all women are under legally binding agreements about what they can say. Some of them just get to talk.”
Haley continued to talk on Tuesday after White House chief economic adviser Larry Kudlow suggested in an interview that she had been “confused.” In a statement, Haley said, “With all due respect, I don’t get confused.”
“Good for you, Nikki!” Colbert said. “You hear that? Nikki Haley does not get confused! Except for that one time she joined the Trump administration. Not sure what she was thinking then.”