Over-educated, underpaid, and living in their parents’ homes, Millennials have faced one of the most unfriendly job markets in living memory. Recent graduates who decided to pursue studies in architecture, the humanities, and the arts have had the toughest time finding a job, according to Georgetown University. College graduates aren’t the only ones feeling the pinch, of course, but Millennials can afford to spend some time working in positions that may look a bit unorthodox. From rocket-man chef to stand-in bridesmaid, The Daily Beast looks at some of the jobs that will keep the shelves stocked with Chef Boyardee for months to come.
The Daily Beast wasn’t able to find any jobs that may take Millennials to other worlds, so in the meantime, this will have to do. Are you a sous-chef with a penchant for the stratosphere? A gourmand who mulls the mysteries of the galaxy? NASA has put out a want ad for foodies who are willing to take part in a four-month experiment to test the gustatory merits of food astronauts may eat on a voyage to Mars. The participants won’t go to the Red Planet, unfortunately. The experiment is scheduled to take place on a Hawaiian lava flow, and test subjects will be required to wear spacesuits while preparing food. There are some requirements making this a perfect gig for the out-of-work biologist. Hurry up, though—applications are due Feb. 29.
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If you have a bad videogame habit, this may be the job for you. Schemes that involve amassing digital currency for resale to wealthy World of Warcraft players with too much cash and too little time have led to the creation of semilegal “gold farms” in China. The country cracked down on the practice in 2009, banning the trade of virtual currency for real-world goods—but not the other way around. In 2010 a court in South Korea ruled that virtual money is, indeed, as good as a genuine spondoolicks, however. So if you’re looking to strike digital gold, time to get off the couch and go East, young man!
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This is definitely a step up from the caddying job you had in high school. Golf courses pay divers $30,000 to $100,000 a year to retrieve the balls that retirees and other country clubbers whack into the water. Divers can gather between 2,500 and 5,000 balls and net around nine cents per ball. It’s not quite as glamorous as diving for pearls or sunken treasure, but it’s outdoor work and is sure to give any unemployed frat boy plenty of Caddyshack-esque tales to share with his similarly out-of-work bros.
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Superlatives abound! This job is, like, totally the best and better than any job you’ve ever had and totally fulfilling and 100 percent–guaranteed to work! If you can read sentences like that without gagging, you may have what it takes to be a fake-review writer. Businesses and promoters that want to give their products a boost on sites like Yelp, Amazon.com, and TripAdvisor are looking for the Raymond Chandler of the consumer report, the Maupassant of the message board, to direct prospective customers to their wares. A group of Cornell researchers even published a paper on the subject of writers paid by the post to push THE BEST BUFFALO CHICKEN PIZZA IN TOWN!!!
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If you’re unemployed and have been for some time, chances are you’ve seen Avatar more than once. But if you are like these two guys, you may have spotted an opportunity. Those massive 80-foot IMAX screens on which James Cameron’s digital world came to life don’t clean themselves, and theaters will pay top dollar for someone to scrape off the dust, Jujubes, and spitballs that build up with the passage of time (and showings of The Avengers: An IMAX 3-D Experience).
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This job is perfect for the inveterate tweeter. Short, incomprehensible sentences that give the illusion of meaning were made for the Internet and after-dinner snacks at Chinese restaurants. Fortune-cookie writer is probably about as hard to get as any writing job in print media these days, but somebody has to do it. Veteran fortune-cookie scribes say you can’t force inspiration, that a truly great fortune comes when least expected. One thing is guaranteed—you’ll never be short of lottery numbers.
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What happens if a groom has eight groomsmen and the bride has only one lonely bridesmaid? Maybe she doesn’t have as many friends or family as her husband does, or the other women bailed last minute. Luckily stand-in bridesmaids can be hired to make up for unequal numbers. There are some general requirements for the job, though. A stand-in bridesmaid is generally personable and can play the part. She is also easy on the eyes for guests seeking a little distraction during a long, sometimes boring ceremony. But by no means is she prettier than the bride. Drama-free struggling thespians may apply. Check Craigslist for opportunities.
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Many young guys are lucky if they manage to talk to even one attractive girl during a night on the town. But there is a small breed of beautiful, mostly college-educated woman whose job it is to be overly upbeat and approachable. Dressed in a uniform of short shorts and low-cut tops, “shot girls” sell trays of jello shots and tequila in plastic test tubes. Customers feed off their flirtatious energy and tip well in return. They make 25 cents per shot sold, with tips ranging from $1 to $20 per round, amounting to between $300 and $600 a night. The keys are to not get stuck mingling with any one patron or group and to keep selling those colorful “shots, shots, shots, shots.”
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You snooze, you lose. This is not the case with professional sleepers. They get paid to sleep while others work to stay awake on the job, struggling through countless cups of coffee and embarrassing yawns. Many professional sleepers participate in university sleep or dream studies. Harvard University’s 19-day research study on sleep breathing patterns pays $10,000. In this particular study, participants must be between 21 and 35, healthy, and not on any medications, tobacco, or other drugs. At Beth Israel Deaconess Medical Center they sleep in tents for 14 nights, breathing air mimicking that found on Mount Rainier. And there are also creative sleeping opportunities like the 2009 art show at the New Museum of Contemporary Art, where women slept as part of the “living art” exhibition. “It’s just sleeping,” said curatorial assistant Jarrett Gregory. “It’s not a performance. It’s not people pretending to sleep.”
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Not all videogames are created equal. It’s the job of a select group of game testers to ensure the games are a success when they hit the market. Gaming companies won’t just take anyone for this dream job, though. The chosen experienced gamers have the privilege of playing a game, usually level after level on repeat. They look for errors in logic, art glitches, spelling mistakes, and, naturally, ways to outwit the system. They provide feedback on whether the game is too difficult or not challenging enough. The goal, after all, is for users to enjoy the games. Hardly work, but gamers can make $25 per 45-minute gaming session and possibly access to future salaried opportunities in these companies.
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Foosball is a fun game, casually played at dingy sports bars, game rooms, and schools—generally free of rules and prizes. But a group of professional players is making a living by rolling a ball around the table that looks like a soccer field and strategizing the movement of miniature men attached to metal rods. The first organized competition dates from the 1940s and 1950s in Europe, where it is known as table soccer. The official competition has concrete rules and regulations and hosts tournaments around the world, most recently in France. The United States ranks sixth in the International Table Soccer Federation—motivational foos fans are needed.
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