Blll Clinton Is Going to Need a Major Fashion Overhaul as First Gentleman
Bill Clinton’s wardrobe is strictly from Dullsville, so if Hillary makes it to the White House, he’s going to need a serious do-over to get off on the right foot.
Bill Clinton as the First Man. We have never had one of those before, and we should really try to get it right the first time.
I don’t remember anything about his clothing style from his presidency, which says something. He really was a country boy in the White House.
Assuming Hillary Clinton becomes president, how can her husband overhaul his closet to best represent her administration in his new role?
First off, he should get rid of the red tie he sometimes wears with a white shirt. Then get rid of the white shirt. He looks sickly, and a white shirt makes it worse. I like a blue oxford, because it has more texture on television. And he should get a top quality makeup artist to make him look less pale.
A couple of strong stripes in his shirts would work—again to make him look healthier.
A few hours a week in the gym would help as well. He should do some weight training to lift up his chest and shoulders. Plain, solid color polo shirts—with no lettering on them—when he is golfing, but you can really notice his chest and shoulders in a polo shirt. I was a caddy when I was a kid and it permanently turned me off golf, but I am sure Bill would find the weight room primitive and harsh. But he needs it. His chest is starting to visibly drop.
He should wear blue or gray suits. He might even try out a plain brown suit; they can be very elegant. I think he should avoid suits with banker’s stripes. They ae so boring and never flattering. He has to learn to blend into the background. He has a terrific smile and is very charming. There is no reason why he can’t be the glad hander at all the official functions.
I can assure that if he picks out his own ties they won’t work well. I think plain colors (but not red and not wide) will be simple and attractive. I like contrast, so dark blue ties with navy blue suits are out.
He has great hair and no stomach, which is really good. The cigar has to go—it makes him look like the sheriff of a rural county in Arkansas.
He would be good at those international trips to do good deeds because he does sincerity so well. He absolutely can’t do anything that leads to a donation to the Clinton Foundation. Their foundation is a great source of patronage. I bet Chelsea will someday take over running it. It’s a fabulous job. She will have an unlimited expense account, get to travel anywhere on the foundation’s money, and everybody will seek her help. It’s like being president, but you won’t meet many Republicans.
In fact, I would have her and her dad together and around as much as possible. Fathers always think they want sons, but it’s daughters who love you the most. Bill always looks so happy with Chelsea.
Chelsea isn’t Sasha or Malia, but while Chelsea is lovely in her own right, it’s an unfair comparison: They have been the perfect First Children of all time. Bill won’t measure up to Michelle either (she has terrific arms and dresses beautifully).
I think that Clinton should always know what his wife is wearing and make sure that he is wearing something that will complement her without it being obvious that they are playing matchy matchy. Wearing a tie that looks good with her pants suit is a nice detail.
He needs a stylist. I’m serious. Anyone who can’t pick out their own clothes has to learn to rely on someone else’s taste.
To be, um, delicate, he needs pants with a zipper that is hard to pull down and pants that are hard to take off. Tight pants never look good on older men, and jeans look horrible, so he should have that on his closet door.
Last of all, it’s not his limelight—it’s hers. He should learn to keep his mouth shut.