Number of Followers: 1,263,375
Tweet Frequency: About 10 per day
Sample Tweet: “Do girls even base any of they lip choices on what we like?”
The musings of Kanye West are generally centered on three topics—women, his “creativity” as an “artist,” and of course, luxury designer brands. Though he does deviate once in a while (“Man ...
ninjas are kind of cool ... I just don't know any personally”), Mr. West is a man of limited interests. And while his musings are often forcibly profound, he does make a point every now and then, even if it’s one that many 11-year-old girls have already discovered—“You basically can say anything to someone on an email or text as long as you put
LOL at the end.” Try it! LOL
Number of Followers: 796,322
Tweet Frequency: About 3 per day
Sample Tweet: “Troll Foot & Santa Barbara Sycamore
http://plixi.com/p/43324816”
When
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia’s thumb-size star Danny DeVito started tweeting last September, it was hard not to get excited. What more could you want than constant access to thoughts of a man whose career highlights include getting drunk on
The View and earning an Emmy for
Taxi? Unfortunately, DeVito didn’t exactly live up to the hype. When he’s not promoting his show, the actor/director is typically tweeting an image of the tips of his toes (better known as “Troll Foot”) in various locations—and sometimes he manages to do
both at once.
Number of Followers: 3,088,170
Tweet Frequency: About 4 per day
Sample Tweet: “
Great weekend with hubby and his family but now it is back to work for us! Play hard-work hard!”
The lovey-dovey factor exchanged between Demi Moore and “hubby” Ashton Kutcher—even when the two are not in the midst of a
tabloid scandal —is enough to make one’s stomach churn. Still, as the rumor mills churn with tales of troubles in May-December paradise, the terms of endearment only seem to
increase on Twitter.
Number of Followers: 5,864,408
Tweet Frequency: About 2 per day
Sample Tweet: “I would like to dedicate today to sitting on my ass and doing nothing!”
When he’s not tweeting about
pop chips, his
fantasy football league, or his “wifey,” Ashton Kutcher, it turns out, really doesn’t have much to say. Is it possible he was more interesting on
Punk’d—even with the Von Dutch hat?
Number of Followers: 35,926
Tweet Frequency: About 3 per day
Sample Tweet: “Lady Gaga to Ellen at MTV Awards: Does this dress made of raw meat make my ass look red?”
A drum roll sound effect should really come with Denis Leary’s Twitter feed. The
Rescue Me actor seems to channel his years on the Boston comedy scene in the 1980s when he crafts his 140-character messages on Twitter: 1/3 are outdated, 1/3 are unfunny, and 1/3 are annoying. And to make matters worse, sometimes he sends them twice. Whether he’s commenting on
Christine O’Donnell, making
offensive fat jokes, or defaming
Domino’s pizza, we’re thankful Leary typically has a script instead of relying on his own words.
Number of Followers: 60,052
Tweet Frequency: About 4 per day
Sample Tweet: “how do i get in so much dumb assed trouble when im in the "eastern bloc" or whatever? ( they do have Kerastase shampoo here btw)”
It’d be unfair not to give Hole frontwoman Courtney Love credit for speaking her mind, but her stream of consciousness tweeting is not only revealing, it’s a little aggressive and disturbing. In August, she went on a rant directed at her 18-year-old daughter
Frances Bean and aired their dirty laundry. “I shouldve hooked up in some loveless marriage to a powerful hedgefund guy then youd be safe, im sorry i didnt. for your sake.i love you,” she tweeted about her late husband Kurt Cobain. She’s also gotten into arguments with her ex and fellow musician
Billy Corgan. But when Love isn’t stirring up trouble, she’s decreasing the IQ of her Twitter followers (see above).
Number of Followers: 898,075
Tweet Frequency: About 2 per day
Sample Tweet: “Jealous that I'm not on LC's new show? Please. That'd be like being jealous of not being on the Titanic.”
Whether he’s shaving his “flesh-colored beard” on YouTube or sharing his thoughts on fellow pop-culture creatures from Bristol Palin to Octomom on Twitter, the former star of
The Hills has taken to the Internet to let out his feelings since the cameras went away. He’s like that irritating 14-year-old boy in your class who would make nerve-grating comments until someone snapped at him. From commenting about eating
endangered species for breakfast or
poverty-stricken prisons in Costa Rica, Pratt has seemingly made it his life mission to offend each and every minority.
Number of Followers: 1,149,642
Tweet Frequency: About 2 per day
Sample Tweet: “Heading out with my girls to get sushi TGIF!”
The Hills star is a typing stereotype—from working out with her dogs to tanning woes to hair-dying days, Heidi Montag paints herself as a walking, tweeting blond Barbie doll. However, the reality star’s shallowness does prove helpful every once in a while. “Warning: to anyone who is thinking about getting their ears pinned, I learned after the fact it is the most painful surgery a person can get,” she
tweeted. Ya heard?
Number of Followers: 692,279
Tweet Frequency: About 4 per day
Sample Tweet: “HAVE A WONDERFUL EVENING and be sure and SHAG the one you LOVE...shagging the one you DON'T LOVE can get.....complicated...lol”
Kristie Alley’s weight may fluctuate, but her fondness for the Caps Lock key is unwavering. The former star of the
Look Who’s Talking movie series has been known to throw strong words around on Twitter—
Conan O’Brien and
Joy Behar have both been on the receiving end. At least Alley also offers
health tips to her followers, whom she refers to as “monkey heads,” “dolphin heads,” “june bug heads,” and “agave heads.”
Number of Followers: 3,376,099
Tweet Frequency: About 11 per day
Sample Tweet: “I'm hungry as a mother fucker. I start training again tomorrow. so I'm gonna have red lobsters no its to Late for that. I don't know”
While most celebrity tweeters who made this list were minor offenders—tweeting syrupy sweet thoughts about spouses, awfully bad jokes, or shallow mundane musings—50 Cent is more offensive than anything. Besides derogatory comments toward women on a near daily basis, the “In Da Club” singer also angered animal-rights groups and gay-rights groups with recent comments. He posted a comment suggesting men
commit suicide if they don’t like having oral sex with women the day after news broke of Rutgers student
Tyler Clementi jumping to his death. When
MTV asked Fitty about his Twitter approach, he said, “What I gave you was some of the things I've seen that were entertaining topic-wise—things that made me laugh. I think it's healthy to smile.” Except nothing’s funny about his Twitter feed.
Number of Followers: 1,419,564
Tweet Frequency: About 4 per day
Sample Tweet : “Is it possible for your head to explode from being super crazy insanely busy!”
Who would have thought that little Punky Brewster would have such a presence in the digital age? Actress Soleil Moon Frye, who played the foster child with a bandana on her knee and sunflowers in her hair in the mid-1980s, earned a big Twitter following as one of the earliest celebrities to join the social-networking site. And though she’s usually sending messages about her loving family or environmentally conscious L.A. baby boutique, Frye celebrated the milestone of reaching 1 million followers with this “
Punky Flashback” video. “I did it for all of you guys because I love you Twitterville,” she explained. Now, with her career revived, her knee freed from bandana bondage, and a book on the way, it’s time for Frye to channel her messages elsewhere.
Number of Followers: 1,981,156
Tweet Frequency: About 8 per day
Sample Tweet: “Britney Spears Has Her Turn On
GLEE”
This 29-year-old comedian has gone from children’s sketch comedy performer to Mariah Carey’s other half to hosting
America’s Got Talent. But Nick Cannon seems to have trouble keeping up on what’s hot. He usually tweets links to his blog posts about yesterday’s news. By the time he shared his uninteresting “Gleek” comments, for example,
Modern Family had become the talk of the TV screen this past week. So if you want to know what you missed when Kanye West performed on
Saturday Night Live, check in with Cannon on Monday… or Tuesday at the latest.
Number of Followers: 1,009,912
Tweet Frequency: About 5 per day
Sample Tweet: “2 answer your question, Ceila, yes, Tom DOES C everyone's tweets in between writing, shooting, & premiering movies...He LOVES 2C them!”
There are few things as frustrating on Twitter as a celebrity who hires a team to tweet for him. Though we appreciate the fact that “Tom Cruise” finally admitted that it is not actually the actor himself typing each message, it still seems senseless for him to have a Twitter account in the first place. All they do is post pictures of him at premieres, send links to his wife Katie Holmes’ films, and tell his more than 1 million followers how much he loves them. But Mr. Cruise, if you really loved us, you’d put your money to better use and type your own 140-character messages—and if not, you’d at least tell your team that “2” and “C” are not words that an Oscar-nominated actor would use… we’d hope.
Number of Followers: 2,813,930
Tweet Frequency: About 7 per day
Sample Tweet: “What a beautiful day today! :) The weather in LA is amazing! :)”
Want to know what Paris Hilton ate for dinner? “
Home meade lasagna.” How about breakfast? “
Yummy french toast.” Hilton’s smiley-face filled feed is full of expectedly not-so-deep thoughts. Few days go by when the hotel heiress doesn’t tweet about her meals, her pets, or wish her followers “tweet dreams.”
Number of Followers: 361,391
Tweet Frequency: Less than one per day
Sample Tweet: “I hear my star on the Canadian Walk of Fame is a bit frazzled, but then again so am I. My best, Bill”
When you only have 140 characters with which to express yourself, you probably shouldn’t waste 13 of them on a formal signature. Alas, “My best, Bill” is the kind of $#*! William Shatner says on Twitter, along with his thoughts on
laughter and
Big Macs. The 79-year-old
Star Trek and notorious Priceline negotiator is full of thoughts—but if they really are his “best,” as his Twitter sign-off indicates, it’s no surprise the reviews for his latest show
$#*! My Dad Says, which is based on another Twitter feed, are abysmal.
Number of Followers: 1,743,576
Tweet Frequency: About 14 per day
Sample Tweet: “It's never too late to #GetOffYourBUT -your 'BUT'=your excuse for not going for your dreams. 'But' it's too late..'But' I'm too short... xoP”
For those who miss Paula Abdul’s unintelligible comments on
American Idol or her short-lived reality-TV stint on Bravo’s
Hey Paula, the erratic former pop star brings the same level of absurdity to her Twitter account. Channeling her inner Tony Robbins, Abdul offers advice to her shockingly high number of followers that is usually about dance, dreams, and goals—the perfect ingredients for a tortuously clichéd country song.
Number of Followers: 2,070,852
Tweet Frequency: About 2 per day
Sample Tweet: “TMI alert: When 1 drinks liter of water at morn workout, 1 is forced 2 pee often. Is especially difficult when 1 is wearing a jumpsuit!”
Model and TV personality Tyra Banks is not shy on Twitter. The self-proclaimed “Business woman by day, SMIZE-r (Smile with your Eyes) by night” divulges her beauty and dating secrets on her feed and no detail is too private. Obviously, for the woman who notoriously used a “vulva puppet” on her talk show and featured a father who waxes his daughter’s bikini area, potty talk is completely fair game.
Number of Followers: 79,262
Tweet Frequency: About 10 per day
Sample Tweet: It was pitch black out the window a moment ago,now the world takes shape before my eyes.Great concept, dawn, don't you think?
Australian actor Russell Crowe may technically be using English on his Twitter page, but he’s surprisingly difficult to understand. Crowe tends to send updates on his two sons (i.e. largely about whether they just fell asleep or are waking up) and request the score of a sporting event that is difficult to determine. Still, Crowe does regale those who follow him with modernized Twitter haikus (see above) or surprising details about his life. See: His penchant for the Australian version of
The X Factor.
Number of Followers: 1,829,262
Tweet Frequency: About 12 per day
Sample Tweet: “Wow, Already my day is full of surprises. In a car service going to a secret location. I have a note in the car from my hubby. Am I dreaming?”
Although every Kardashian family member has an active Twitter account, middle sister Khloe’s (the wife of L.A. Lakers star Lamar Odom) is particularly difficult to take. Addressing her followers as “dolls,” Kardashian uses the medium as a platform to promote herself, her sisters, and her relationship. Even upping Paris Hilton in the Twitter-inspired pun territory, Kardashian refers to those who make up the Twitterverse as “tweethearts.”
Number of Followers: 238,334
Tweet Frequency: About 4 per day
Sample Tweet: “Portland is BEAUTIFUL!Kids gr8 on flight.Flight attendant said 2 Stella "Miss McDermott can I get U something 2 drink" she said "Just wine"”
Kids may say the darndest things; but when former
90210 star Tori Spelling documents each and every thing her son and daughter say or do, those gem-like moments begin to lose their shine just a bit. Though it’s impossible to predict how 3-year-old Liam and 2-year-old Stella will feel about their mother using their lives as Twitter fodder, wouldn’t it be safer for Spelling to simply stop completely?
Number of Followers: 1,701,910
Tweet Frequency: About 6 per day
Sample Tweet: “Dear Hollywood Agents: Stop making ridiculous requests for your clients. THE GAME HAS CHANGED. Accept it. Time to tighten belts & get real.”
New Jersey native Kevin Smith is best known as the writer-director-actor behind comedies from
Clerks to
Chasing Amy, but one Twitter rant about his weight leading to an uncomfortable scandal on a Southwest flight also brought Smith some serious notoriety. While it may have been an injustice, Smith’s Twitter barrage was not winning him many fans—even now that the
Fatgate dust has settled. Still, Smith always seems to find another reason to complain (and use Caps Lock).
Number of Followers: 2,993,207
Tweet Frequency: Less than one per day
Sample Tweet: “I met a wonderful man. Damn I'm lucky!”
One would think that after a failed marriage to Nick Lachey and a high-profile relationship and breakup from John Mayer, 30-year-old pop star Jessica Simpson would attempt to keep her personal life as far away from public scrutiny as possible. Alas, this apparent romantic just can’t help herself. Between “her wonderful man” and this
admission accompanying a recent photo—“I have a major crush on you”—Simpson unfortunately can’t help but share her feelings with the world.
Number of Followers: 3,219,722
Tweet Frequency: About one per day
Sample Tweet: “Is it funny to anyone else how Lane Kiffin's first season at USC doesn’t REALLY count?”
Filming a movie about Facebook didn’t help Justin Timberlake learn how to use social-networking media. Although the smooth-moving Timberlake knows how to dominate the stage, his ability to captivate the Twittersphere is not quite up to par. Whether it's random sports-related topics or blurry backstage pictures, having Timberlake on Twitter is more of a tease of something we know could be great.
Number of Followers: 120,574
Tweet Frequency: About 2 per day
Sample Tweet: “Hey all you Tweebas! Sorry I haven't been on lately. My Mac Book Pro is in the shop!!!! Bummer!!!!”
Considering the speed at which country music legend Ms. McEntire replies to her fans on Twitter (also known as Tweebas), it’s doubtful the account is actually managed by the Queen of Country herself. Though diehard Tweebas are delighted to see quick responses, it doesn’t make a great case for McEntire herself overseeing her largely self-promotional account. Also, the excessive exclamation marks just can’t be accurate. Will the real tweeting Reba McEntire please stand up?
Number of Followers: 27,581
Tweet Frequency: Less than one per day
Sample Tweet : “I'm lowbrow. Lower than the Olsen twins' caloric intake.”
Singer and actress Bette Midler is a bit like the female Denis Leary of the Twitterverse. It’s an admittedly unexpected comparison, but they both have below-the-belt tweets and invitations for a drummer to “ba-dum-chh” after sending their messages. Sure, the Divine Miss M is a classy lady, but her
Twitter humor (“What IS Restless Leg Syndrome? My husband has Restless Penis Syndrome...that can't be his leg in the middle of the night.”) isn’t exactly of high caliber. Trying that hard to elicit laughter doesn’t look good on anyone.
