Cressida's Naughty Nickname

After Pippa Middleton's bottom, get ready for Cressida's ass.

It hadn't escaped the Royalist's attention that there may be several crude variations on epically named Cressida Bonas's last name, and now, thanks to that bastion of tabloid journalism the Sunday People, it emerges that Cressida is known as Bonne Ass by her friends thanks to her enviable derriere.

This, alone, is reason enough to throw out the Leveson report.

According to the People, the nickname is 'hated' by Cressdia "and she has asked pals to stop using it".

In other young royal romance news, Harry flew to Lesotho in southern Africa today, but, according to reports, he won't be staying on for the Branson wedding at which Cressida will be a guest.