The author of Confessions of a Video Vixen, which first exposed the bad behavior of numerous hip-hop stars when it was published nearly two decades ago, says that she was “gifted” to Diddy in February 2001, fresh off his split with Jennifer Lopez, after a day of “popping pills” and drinking with music execs around Los Angeles in a limousine.
“In retrospect, I realized that I was given to him as a gift by another executive,” says Elisabeth Ovesen, 46, in an interview with the Daily Beast. “Diddy’s car pulled up” as they were leaving a club around 3 a.m., she remembered, “He asked who I was, and the men spoke for me.”
Those “men,” Ovesen alleged in her 2005 Vixen memoir were Murder Inc Record’s boss Irv Gotti and flagship artist Ja Rule. It was the height of hip-hop’s opulence, when music video budgets ballooned and had auteur-level creative direction—and appearing in such productions could make someone a star. A 21-year-old Ovesen, then known as Karrine Steffans, had appeared in Jay-Z’s music video for his 2000 hit song “Hey Papi,” which reportedly cost at $1 million to make.
Diddy, then known as “Puff Daddy,” was “at the forefront of the million-dollar look,” Ovesen remembers, and she knew meeting him at that club was an opportunity. “He was like, ‘Send her to my house,’” she says. “And that was it. I got the order to go to his house, and that was the first time he and I spent time.”
Ovesen knew what was expected of her when she showed up to Diddy’s house, and she went in “eyes open” planning to write about a world where “nearly everything goes.”
“I was not one of his victims,” Ovesen told the Daily Beast. “And his victims deserve the space and time to discuss what happened in those rooms.” Ovesen toed a line between visitor and voyeur in a 2006 Oprah interview titled, “Smart Women on ‘Stupid Girls.’” Ovesen said the platform launched her book to the tops of many bestseller lists.
“No one wanted the book at first,” Ovesen recalled in a 2015 Vlad TV interview. “Mainstream media was like what is this Black girl with her stories with all these Black people.”
Yet the book was an early hit in Black homes and hip-hop circles, the New York Times reported at the time, because Ovesen was one of the first to pulled the curtain back on power, sex and sexuality in hip-hop and entertainment. Now Ovesen is gearing up to launch the 20th anniversary edition of Confessions of a Video Vixen next year.
In the book’s more salacious pages, it is revealed Ovesen had relationships with Jay-Z, DMX, and Diddy. She has also disclosed romantic connections with Vin Diesel, Fred Durst, Bobby Brown, Lil Wayne, Method Man, and Bill Maher, among others. She explained that these were not trysts, the majority of them were relationships that lasted for years.
“Bill and I were together from 2005 to 2007, and are still friends to this day,” Ovesen tells the Daily Beast. “I love that man. As for other connections, I no longer discuss my personal life with the public.”
In telling her story, Ovesen says she hoped to change the conversation around “female sexual autonomy” in a world where women are treated as objects to be used.
At one party allegedly at Diddy’s mansion on Miami’s Star Island—the same mansion he allegedly put up as bail collateral after his Sept 16 arrest on racketeering and human trafficking charges—Ovesen remembers it like The Great Gatsby: men in tuxedos, topless women in angel wings, champagne and synchronized swimmers on the outside, with group sex in the bathrooms, trays of hors d’oeuvres and drug pills being passed around on the inside.
“You choose your pill, you take your champagne, and that’s your vibe for the night,” she says. “It’s f---ing intense.”
She adds, “And that was kind of one scene.”
A darker scene was happening behind closed doors in which men were inflicting power and pain over women. Ovesen said seeing video of Diddy attacking his then girlfriend Cassie after an alleged “Freak Off” was triggering.
“I didn’t watch the whole thing. It was very triggering. And I knew exactly what that was,” says Ovesen, revealing that she has been frequently abused by rappers that she has dated. “I know exactly how that feels. I know exactly. I know exactly how that feels.”
She adds, “And it’s not just Diddy, and it’s not just music or hip hop.” The problem, Ovesen said, is men who deep down hate women.
“Men who hate women, men who hate who they are, who can’t admit to their sexuality, who are pretending to be straight when they’re not. And they hate women because they can’t,” says Ovesen. “They don’t love women. Most of them want to be women, and they can’t, and they hate us. They beat us early and often.”
In another scene from her book, Ovesen remembered popping ecstasy and Diddy taking her and rapper Xzibit to a queer club. In another moment, Diddy allegedly warned the rapper, who she called a friend, that she was the type of woman who would have you “on tape with fingers in your booty.”
“That was so weird. It was so weird,” says Ovesen. “And X[zibit] thought it was weird.” She adds, “I mean, we hadn’t even had sex, Diddy and I, so I’m like, well, that’s a weird thing to say.”
The Daily Beast could not reach Diddy’s lawyer Marc Agnifilo for comment after numerous attempts.
Diddy’s bodyguard Gene Deal recently alleged in an interview last year that Ovesen’s time with Diddy was what ultimately ended his relationship with Jennifer Lopez. More artists and associates in Diddy’s orbit, including Danity Kane members Aubrey O’Day and Dawn Richard have also come out with allegations that seem to back what Ovesen has written.
“One thing about those tables is they’re going to turn. And honestly, it’s women who turn them,” said Ovesen. “When we support women who tell the truth over men who tell lies, society wins. I have no message for men. My message is for women. More women need to tell their stories as loudly and often as possible. Trust me, you will survive, you will make it through, and you will come out stronger and vindicated in the end. No one has to lie on these men to finish them. The truth is more than enough.”