Man Crushes Seven Police Cars

Roger Pion, a 34-year-old farmer, hopped in an oversized farm tractor, headed to the police station, and crushed more than seven police cars yesterday, taking revenge for a previous arrest over marijuana possession. The attack took place in Vermont–not a state generally known for Grand Theft Auto-style antics–and claimed more than half of the district's fleet of squad cars. Nobody was hurt, but the police couldn't pursue Pion, due to predictable problems with transportation. “We’re going to have to get the jaws of life up here to pry the trunks open and see about the rifles and shotguns,” Sheriff Kirk Martin told the Associated Press. “The radios are ruined.”