DUNZO

Stephen Colbert Believes Al Franken Is Finished

The ‘Late Show’ host argues the latest sexual-misconduct allegation against the Minnesota senator is ‘the straw that groped the camel’s back.’

A chorus of 30-plus Democratic senators have called on Sen. Al Franken (D-MN) to resign after a seventh woman came forward to accuse the former comedian of sexual misconduct.

“It seems like every day a new man is being accused of sexual misconduct—but not today,” announced Stephen Colbert at the top of The Late Show on Wednesday night. “Today it’s the same man: Minnesota senator—and former Minnesota senator—Al Franken.”

After a taping of Franken’s radio show in 2006, a former Democratic congressional aide alleges that as she was packing up her things and leaving, she came face to face with Franken’s lips and had to duck to avoid his kiss.

“He was between me and the door, and he was coming at me to kiss me. It was very quick, and I think my brain had to work really hard to be like ‘Wait, what is happening?’ But I knew whatever was happening was not right, and I ducked,” the unnamed woman told Politico. “I was really startled by it, and I just sort of booked it towards the door, and he said, ‘It’s my right as an entertainer.’”

“No, it isn’t,” offered Colbert. “I’m an entertainer and I happen to always carry around a copy of the Bill of Rights for Entertainers… I have the right to ride the rides at Disney ahead of children, I skip security at airport through one of those unmarked doors you people can’t see, and unlimited free Apple stuff...”

Franken’s apparent sense of celebrity entitlement sounds an awful lot like President Trump, who boasted in the infamous Access Hollywood tape, “You know I’m automatically attracted to beautiful—I just start kissing them. It’s like a magnet. Just kiss. I don’t even wait. And when you’re a star, they let you do it. You can do anything. Grab ’em by the pussy. You can do anything.”

Colbert—like many on the Democratic side—seems to believe that Franken is finished.

“Now, Franken says ‘this allegation is categorically not true,’ but this accusation appears to be the straw that groped the camel’s back,” Colbert said.