Trumpworld has a big problem with Hunter Biden using his famous name to get ahead, but none at all with irony.
As someone who has also enjoyed the foulmouthed, one-eyed mistress that is nepotism, I feel uniquely qualified to write on the subject—in this instance, how a guy who dodged taxes while inheriting his dad’s mobbed-up real estate business and now presides over an administration blind to even the most overt corruption and staffed largely by people’s dysfunctional children became extremely committed to calling out the age-old issue of people making money and achieving power through family connections.
It all smells like Eau de Trump: hypocritical, obsessive, and unintentionally hilarious.
Of course, there’s former mayor Rudy Giuliani, now working for free as Trump’s personal lawyer in what’s maybe an attempt to keep from paying the woman who’s soon to be his third ex-wife, and who recently tweeted that “Biden’s family has been selling his offices for 5 decades.From doing business with sleazy little crooks, Ukrainian organized crime, Whitey Bulger’s nephew, the Chinese government, to a Madoff type, and lots more. All covered up by Corrupt Media!”
One can see that Rudy doesn’t feel comfortable with Joe using his family connections to help his son. Rudy would never do that.
I mean, it’s not like Andrew Giuliani works for the Trump administration, and by “not” I mean that Andrew Giuliani works for the Trump administration as “associate director for the office of Public Liaison.” This is obviously not a nepotism hire given Andrew’s experience “public liaisoning” during the many years he spent trying to become a professional golfer including on eight episodes of the Golf Channel’s The Big Break. If that won’t prepare a person for the rigors and responsibilities of government service I don’t know what will.
Of course, there’s Trump himself, who said last month that, “When Biden’s son walks out of China with $1.5 billion in a fund, and the biggest funds in the world can’t get money out of China, and he’s there for one quick meeting and he flies in on Air Force Two, I think that’s a horrible thing.” It’s nice to see that Donald doesn’t think that presidential or vice presidential spawn should waste taxpayer dollars, and it makes sense because it’s not like Ivanka, Junior and Eric went to London with dad and hung out with the Queen on the taxpayer dime.
It’s not like Ivanka, who kept getting trademarks from China even after saying she was shutting down her apparel business hawking sweatshop-produced plastic shoes, and her husband who ran the newspaper his dad bought for him into the ground are both senior advisers to the president, ready to take on little things like Mideast peace and the opioid crisis.
It’s not like Junior, who tweeted out a story headlined “Eight Things to Know About the Biden Family’s Culture of Corruption” spent 2016 direct-messaging with Russian cut-out Julian Assange and had a meeting at Trump Tower during the election with Russians about “adoptions” but was finally deemed too stupid to collude by Robert Mueller.
It’s not like Eric, whose charitable foundation paid nearly $150,000 to Trump Organization companies in the midst of the presidential election, wrote an op-ed in which he quoted the wisdom of “the great Marcus Aurelius from The Gladiator” while grousing about how unfair the press is to him and his family in not attacking Hunter Biden.
I mean, it is like that. As champions of all that is right and good, the large adult sons were eyewitnesses to the state of New York shuttering the Trump family charity that mostly gave to the Trumps.
Who better to educate us on the ways of cleaning up corruption?
There’s more, of course. It’s not like conservative pundit Hugh Hewitt, who recently wrote a tweetstorm about Hunter Biden’s possible paternity problems and was a staunch defender of Scott Pruitt, had a son who worked for the hopeless corrupt EPA chief, and then landed a gig at the State Department as a senior adviser in the Bureau of Global Public Affairs after Pruitt finally resigned..
It’s not like Mike Huckabee, who’s tweeted about “Biden’s cushy deals w/ Ukraine and China #Enough” had a daughter who worked for Trump as the White House press secretary or anything.
And it’s certainly not like Mitch McConenell, who’s already told Kentucky voters that “The way that impeachment stops is a Senate majority with me as Majority Leader,” is married to Trump’s transportation secretary.
Perhaps, when they’re done with the wisdom of The Gladiator, maybe this nepotastic crew can stream the Borgias? Then again, that might strike too close to home—or they might mistake it for a how-to instead of a cautionary tale.