World Still Has Time to End

As you were, everyone. You officially survived the Mayan apocalypse, avoiding "cosmic inflation" or a collision of Earth with an unforeseen comet or some other end-of-the-world catastrophe that you hoped would keep you from having to work on Friday. But some scientists say doomsday may still be upon us. We may very well be in a "false-vacuum state," one apocalypse correspondent told The Guardian, adding that solar energy might "re-condense at some point into something else, new forms of matter governed by new laws of nature. But we wouldn't be here to see any of it." Now get back to work.