In an interview with The New Yorker, the father of Newtown shooter Adam Lanza reveals that he wishes his son had never been born. “How much do I beat up on myself about the fact that he’s my son? A lot,” Peter Lanza said. He recognizes his permanent connection with the death of 26 children and teachers at Sandy Hook, and says he doesn't even like to say his last name. “I thought about changing it,” he said, “but I feel like that would be distancing myself and I cannot distance myself.” Lanza said he has no doubt "Adam would have killed me in a heartbeat, if he’d had the chance."