PROBLEM CHILD

Seth Meyers Knows Why Ivanka Testimony Freaks Out Trump

The “Late Night” host thinks Trump is scared about what his daughter might have to say under oath—and rightly so.

Last week, Judge Arthur Engoron—the judge in Donald Trump’s $250 million civil fraud trial in New York—ordered Ivanka Trump to testify in the case against her dad. And Seth Meyers can’t imagine that decision is sitting well with the former POTUS.

“You know Trump is freaked out about Ivanka having to testify, because she seems like she might actually know shit,” says Meyers. “I have to believe she’s the only child Trump trusted to do actual business. Ivanka was crunching numbers while Eric was covering his face in Rogaine and Don Jr. was out sitting on that stump.”

“Ivanka taking the stand is bad for Trump because she’s the only one who can actually stand,” the Late Night host said of the notoriously posture-challenged Trump family. “They all stand like they forgot to take the hanger out of their shirts.”

Perhaps even more surprising to Meyers is the fact that, through all the indictments and gag orders, the twice-impeached 45th president still remains “the far-and-away frontrunner” as the Republicans’ presidential candidate for 2024.

“They say you can indict a ham sandwich,” says Meyers. “But once you’ve been indicted four times, I think you’re less like a ham and more like a turkey.”

While Ivanka has distanced herself from her dear ol’ dad since he begrudgingly left office in 2021, many believe her timing—read: waiting until her father was no longer in power—didn’t do her any favors. Ivanka is currently expected to testify on Nov. 8, just days after brothers Eric and Don Jr. take the stand, and following her father’s time in the witness chair.

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Jennifer M. Wood

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