Swine Flu Hits Royal High School

Just when you thought the swine flu threat was dimming: Eton, preparatory academy to the UK’s most well-heeled gentlemen-in-training (including former pupil Prince Harry) has announced it will close its doors until June 7 due to the revelation that a 13-year-old boy has come down with swine flu. This brings the United Kingdom’s swine flu toll to 203. No word on how the boy caught the flu, and whether his infections means Eton’s primogeniture-primed lads—and the fate of the crown!—are at risk.