Nick Offerman used his slot on The Daily Show to rip into “demented grandpa” Donald Trump and his efforts to make America’s 250th birthday all “about himself.”
The Parks and Rec star, 55, spoke about Trump’s grand plans for the country’s big anniversary this summer—which the president himself has described as “the most spectacular birthday party the world has ever seen.”
“America’s semiquincentennial is here. And to throw its semiquinceañera, I hope we have a great party planner,” Offerman began, donning a party hat and sitting in front of a cake.
The Daily Show panned to footage of the 79-year-old president bringing up his “pledge” to throw grand celebrations for the country. Offerman removed his hat and the cake in response.
“Sure, Trump planned the party. It’s not like you have anything else going on,” the Emmy-winning actor quipped sarcastically. “Gas prices are hovering just below Fury Road levels. But have fun picking out the balloons.”
“Perhaps I am rushing to judgment,” he continued. “We can only hope Trump puts as much love into America’s birthday as he would for Jeffrey Epstein’s,” referencing Trump’s alleged birthday letter to the late financier, in which he allegedly wrote a poem within a sketch of a naked woman.
The host then walked the audience through the list of anniversary celebrations that will feature Trump, such as the U.S. Treasury’s plan to have dollar bills emblazoned with the billionaire’s signature and the U.S. Commission of Fine Arts approval to have Trump’s face on a commemorative 24-karat gold coin. In addition, the 2026 National Park annual pass will feature the faces of Donald Trump and George Washington.
“Oh, come on,” said Offerman. “I go to national parks to get away from your face!”
“You know, I would have assumed that the party theme for America’s birthday would have been, I don’t know, America. But I’m sensing from the party decorations that a different theme is emerging,” Offerman retorted.
If all of this wasn’t enough, suggested Offerman, the president plans to replicate Paris’ Arc de Triomphe in Washington, D.C., which has been dubbed the ‘Arc de Trump‘. The Daily Show displayed footage of the president showing reporters miniature models of the arc, which has been proposed to be 250-feet tall.
“Can’t he play with his model replicas in the basement like a normal demented Grandpa?!” Offerman said.
The host described the arrangements for America’s 250th birthday as “self-aggrandizing celebrations,” saying that Trump is behaving like “some Roman emperor.” This characterization was only compounded by the president’s plans to have modern-day “gladiator fights,” as Offerman put it, in the form of a UFC match to take place on the White House lawn the day Trump turns 80.
“Blood sports for the entertainment of a Caesar is not a show of strength,” Offerman responded. “It’s literally the first sign of a declining empire.”
“Number two, of course, is starting a war in Persia. Oh, s--t.”
The Last of Us actor urged the audience to prevent Trump from turning the historic moment of America’s 250th birthday into a celebration of himself.
“This is America’s birthday. It’s not about one man. It’s about our country and its ideals. So forget the empty, jingoistic posturing and find your own ways to patriotically party down,” he said.
“Go to historical reenactments, or better yet, do your own! If you’ve never thrown tea into a harbor, you have not lived. Or get into a fistfight with an actual British person. Dibs on Cumberbatch,” he joked.
“Or hell, forget that. Go into one of those national parks. Celebrate America’s natural beauty,” Offerman continued. “And while you’re there, get in your birthday suit and partake of some tasteful lovemaking with someone you care about. Dibs on Cumberbatch.”
